Post updated: January 5th, 2017
Falling in love makes you think anything is possible. The sun shines brighter; the grass looks greener; and your heart is full of glee. Imagine feeling that joy both day and night by living together and sharing each precious moment. It’s time to get your head out of the clouds, though, and get practical about the nitty gritty and very concrete reality of how to move in with your beloved with our moving tips below.
You were brought together for a reason and stayed together for another. However, when you’re together 24/7, through good times and bad, the little things you typically excuse magnify to possibly intolerable annoyances. Ask yourself if you can live with this person, and if your expectations about where you’d like to live mesh. Since you’ll be living in the same, small space, do you know where each other’s personal boundaries lay and what their dealbreakers are? Before you call any movers, Rent.com suggests engaging in trial runs to see if living together works.
Money and Housekeeping Matters
Money comes between even the strongest relationships including friends, family and marriages. Introduce financial topics right away to get them out of the way and establish spending and saving parameters. Deciding which bills to pay or splitting them as well as divvying up chores and determining who is responsible for what will protect you from future arguments. Kiplinger.com strongly encourages you to “keep your finances separate,” make major purchases independently and designate who owns the item.
His + Hers = Theirs?
Consider if you’re like to pursue a new residence together or blend your belongings with your partner at their current home or yours. Take inventory of what furniture and household items you and your partner individually own. Compare and contrast what you have and need together, sorting items into trash, treasure and donation piles. This will require using your relationship compromising skills if your partner desperately wants to keep a Pez dispenser collection, for example, that you think is silly. Remember, storage is always an option.
Relationship Stepping Stone or Stall
Jumping into a living arrangement with someone you’re not committed to or comfortable with puts unnecessary pressure on a tentative relationship before it’s time. Moving in before you’re ready can ruin one if it’s for the wrong reasons, says Rent.com. Even though it’s a sensitive subject, you should discuss if this is a stepping stone to a more permanent arrangement or a “you’ll see” relationship. Otherwise, hurt feelings and resentment could erupt if your relationship view differs from your partner’s. In that case, maybe moving in together should be off the table.
Get It in Writing
Another issue to discuss is if both your names will be listed on the lease. Kiplinger.com says that if you don’t share space on the agreement, the one on the lease could be held liable for payment and have trouble getting the ex to pay if things sour.
Moving Together Matters
Now that you worked out the serious stuff, it’s time to hire a moving company or arrange for friends and family to moonlight as movers. After you’ve sorted through your joint belongings and decided what is going to your new place, anything that remains could be sent to storage until you part ways or move into a bigger home together!